By Beth on Friday, November 24, 2000 - 01:41 am:

Why can't I lose some of this pride.

I went to a deal at my daughter and son's church. We, the parents, were supposed to do these physical games(running for the most part). I, of course, don't feel like being seen as a baby or something so I participated in a couple. I joked around about how it would affect me but because of my age and physical appearance I don't think that they knew that I was telling the truth. I sprained my right ankle(mild) and had it in my ankle brace for Thanksgiving, as well as having to use my cane. My shoulders,hips,knees,and feet hurt as well.

I feel so guilty because of, again not being normal.

Hugs beth, I feel better.

By Alex on Friday, November 24, 2000 - 08:02 am:

Hi Beth,

My name's Alex and i'm 16...from the UK.
I can certainly relate to your experience. I know what it is like, not wanting to be the odd one out. I also know what it is like to feel the aftermath of taking part in such things.
My advice to you is as much for everyday life as it is for your quandry. Never do something unless you feel totally comfortable with it. There is clearly no point in hurting yourself just so you feel "normal". Hopefully what you have said is based on a conception of every day society. It has been my experience that most people wont judge you on your physical capabilities. If they do and you aren't comfortable with it, then it seems that you can't really be happy around these people. I'm sure it is not as bad as you think and if you start by telling someone close to you about your problem, it will probably make it easier for you to tell others and thus not have to feel so awkward among these people. This should ultimately help you feel better about yourself as well.

I hope my philosophy doesn't seem to belittle the problem and can help you take care of yourself in the future.

By Sheena on Friday, November 24, 2000 - 08:10 am:

Beth,
I think I know how you feel. Were you good at this kind of sports when you were younger? That just makes it worse.

I had to make a joke of it, when there was yet another thing I couldn't take part in, although I'm sure they thought I was just lazy. If it's any consolation, the problem will go away eventually. They have stopped asking me because they think I'm too old!

Take care.

By TJ on Friday, November 24, 2000 - 09:05 pm:

For the most part, I've never been very good at most sports, either, because of this. But don't feel like you have to participate in something that will put you at risk. Who cares what the rest of the world thinks? Tell them, "No, thanks," with a happy smile on your face and kick back and enjoy the show -- volunteer to be the scorekeeper! It took me a while to have the courage to tell people some activity wasn't something I could safely do, but the people around me are starting to understand when I tell them I'll have to pass on it. Enjoy the things you can, and don't sweat the rest -- oh, yeah -- and keep smiling. :-)

By Gwen on Friday, November 24, 2000 - 11:41 pm:

Beth, People can be so very intolerant. Even when we are all supposed to be culturally sensitive etc it seems to me that those of us who have a hidden disorder aren't believed. I can no longer run because I simply don't have the elasticity in my ligaments to provide the necessary bounce and ankles sprain soooo easily. I now say to people that I have a condition that affects my joints and I can't do anything that places strain on them but......I'd be glad to pass round the orange juice at half time or help out in the kitchen to free-up someone else. At my son's school there are regular working bees which are usually quite physical. I've told the school secretary that I can't do the heavy stuff but don't mind pushing a wheelbarrow or sweeping up. I also offer to do the monotonous things.
There are ways around it. It's just sorting out the one that suits you.